KFC final updated

KFCs Newest Product

Kentucky Fried Chicken for years has had a reputation for the need to satisfy it's customers. Since KFC opened, quality and quantity of chicken has increased year after year as the consumers request for its products grew. Very rarely has KFC ever encountered any problems with it's customers, that was, until PETA was formed and KFC was often protested against for it's destruction of the chicken life. However, KFC  follows the motto " the consumer is always right", so they have taken a new approach to satisfy everyone.

Some purchase chicken for the flavor and for their stomachs fulfillment. Now vegetarians, vegans, or those against the killing of chickens have a chance to save one. After years of experiments and long intense meetings with the advertising and marketing committees, Kentucky Fried Chicken has just released three new spectacular breeds of genetically modified pet chickens that may be purchased at any KFC near you.

Because of the recent olympic atmosphere, KFC has created a chicken that not only has genetic factors of specific athletes, but also received there genetic talents. KFC believes that the new Michael Phelps Olympic chicken will be a quick hit. 

The KFC athletic staff has been working with these chickens in our Olympic sized swimming pool and have even allowed them to compete. This will allow the talents of your swimming chicken to increase as well as the strength. The Michael Phelps Olympic chicken comes with 19 Olympic medals as well as an American Speedo, a Phelps swim cap, and a pair of goggles. You can't go wrong with this Olympic chicken.

Another option is the Elvis chicken which will be targeted for older consumers. Your heart will melt as soon as you hear this "chick magnet" hit the stage. He sings, plays guitar, and even dances in an identical fashion to Elvis. And girl's watch out, he even has Elvis's hair.

Lastly, KFC in a joint effort with Chic-Filet has come up with the Political Sarah Palin chicken. The two companies felt they needed to represent chicks in a more appropriate matter and what is more appropriate then politics. No one will ever be bored with the Sarah Palin Chicken.  Her body is covered with several mouths each with there own voice box. Listen to her speak about multiple topics at once! With her suave sense of style and her intense views on pretty much every topic possible, you will never get bored. She walks, she talks, and if you do decide you want to cook her, she tastes pretty juicy too!

So keep an eye out for KFC's 3 new live breeds of genetically modified pet chickens in all KFC stores near you! More breeds to come.

Both Twitter and Facebook exploded today with post rumoring that Marilyn Monroe, America’s favorite actress and model was fully covered in tattoos from head to toe. Sounds unbelievable right? Well believe it because new images have surfaced showing Marilyn barring them all with a huge smile on her face. The images surfaced with a handwritten letter by the late Allan “Whitney” Snyder, her make up artist, explaining the process of covering them.


“Marilyn was a huge tattoo fan so she figured why the hell not. I tried to talk her out of it by telling her it would be the end of her career but she came back at me and said If I was such a great make-up artist, I would be able to make them "disappear" whenever she was in the eye. So that's exactly what I did. I was notified prior to her public appearances so I could cover her with flesh colored make up. Fun times"

Final Updated. Carlita

Carlita

Fist of Fury and Relaxation

It has been 39 years since Chinese-American actor and martial arts instructor Bruce Lee was found dead in his co-stars home. World renowned as one of the top, if not THE top, martial arts action star of the century, Lee's death has always been full of controversy. Some people believe that he was murdered by Chinese mafia then his body was moved into Taiwanese actress Betty Tingpei's home. Others believe that he died because of marijuana overdose. In 1993, after the sudden death of his son, Brandon Lee, conspiracy theories about the Illuminati being involved in both of their deaths had emerged left and right. Experts have denied these allegations despite the strong evidence. Rumors have thrived in the past few years but Digital Media Magazine is putting all of them to rest. Months of blindly following a tip from a source who only identified as "Dragon", we were able to find the Bruce Lee in Reno, Nevada. Digital Media Magazine (D): Wow, Bruce Lee, we are thrilled to have found you! Bruce Lee (BL): 太差劲了。我的封面已被烧断。 D: I'm sorry Mr. Lee but can you say that again in English? BL: 是无形的...不成形，像水。 D: Okay, we apologize Mr Lee but we neglected to bring an interpreter. BL: 现在你把一杯水，就成了一杯。 D: I guess we'll have to just communicate through body language. You're pretty good at moving your body, you know, martial arts and dancing and stuff. BL: 倒入一瓶水，它就变成了瓶子。 D: Okay, that sounded like a yes! You look very good. You're 72 now, correct? You must have very good Asian genes. You look fantastic! What has been keeping you so young? BL: 水可以流淌，或爬或滴或崩溃！ D: Oh, no no no Mr. Lee, we didn't mean to offend you. We're just frankly surprised and nervous to be in your presence. BL: 是水，我的朋友......

D: Maybe personal life is not a good topic. Okay, so let's talk about your new business venture. Tell us about "Fist of Fury and Relaxation". What made you open up a massage parlor or a "House of Pleasure", as you call it, in Las Vegas? BL: 我总是学到一些东西，那就是：始终是自己 D: I see... What I gather from your body language and the language inflection and intonation is that... People come to Las Vegas for pleasure but sometimes they get stressed out. So Fist of Fury and Relaxation is a place to just unwind. Is that accurate? What kind of stress would people encounter in Las Vegas? BL: 并表达自己，对自己有信心。 D: I see... Umm.. I guess what you're saying is that sometimes they wake up and they are married to a stranger? Or they lose a lot of money and/pr properties whilst gambling? BL: 不出门，并期待一个成功的个性和重复他 D: I'll take that as a yes. That sounds great. Well, Mr Lee, thank you so much for this wonderful opportunity. We will certainly come in for a Shiatsu massage. BL: 所有类型的知识，最终导致自我知识。

There you have it folks. Bruce Lee is alive, well, and owns a massage parlor in Nevada. You heard and seen it first here on Digital Media Magazine. Don't forget to visit Fist of Fury and Relaxation and let your aching muscles be karate chopped to recovery.

KFCs Newest Product

Kentucky Fried Chicken for years has had a reputation for the need to satisfy it's customers. Since KFC opened, quality and quantity of chicken has increased year after year as the consumers request for its products grew. Very rarely has KFC ever encountered any problems with it's customers, that was, until PETA was formed and KFC was often protested against for it's destruction of the chicken life. However, KFC  follows the motto " the consumer is always right", so they have taken a new approach to satisfy everyone.

Some purchase chicken for the flavor and for their stomachs fulfillment. Now vegetarians, vegans, or those against the killing of chickens have a chance to save one. After years of experiments and long intense meetings with the advertising and marketing committees, Kentucky Fried Chicken has just released three new spectacular breeds of genetically modified pet chickens that may be purchased at any KFC near you.

Because of the recent olympic atmosphere, KFC has created a chicken that not only has genetic factors of specific athletes, but also received there genetic talents. KFC believes that the new Michael Phelps Olympic chicken will be a quick hit. 

The KFC athletic staff has been working with these chickens in our Olympic sized swimming pool and have even allowed them to compete. This will allow the talents of your swimming chicken to increase as well as the strength. The Michael Phelps Olympic chicken comes with 19 Olympic medals as well as an American Speedo, a Phelps swim cap, and a pair of goggles. You can't go wrong with this Olympic chicken.

Another option is the Elvis chicken which will be targeted for older consumers. Your heart will melt as soon as you hear this "chick magnet" hit the stage. He sings, plays guitar, and even dances in an identical fashion to Elvis. And girl's watch out, he even has Elvis's hair.

Lastly, KFC in a joint effort with Chic-Filet has come up with the Political Sarah Palin chicken. The two companies felt they needed to represent chicks in a more appropriate matter and what is more appropriate then politics. No one will ever be bored with the Sarah Palin Chicken.  Her body is covered with several mouths each with there own voice box. Listen to her speak about multiple topics at once! With her suave sense of style and her intense views on pretty much every topic possible, you will never get bored. She walks, she talks, and if you do decide you want to cook her, she tastes pretty juicy too!

So keep an eye out for KFC's 3 new live breeds of genetically modified pet chickens in all KFC stores near you! More breeds to come.

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DOG

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